Back from Savannah

I went to see Jena last weekend and had a delightful vacation! The week before I worked my ass off making progress with patients and paperwork, and even had a social life.

I even made it to the dentist, which is one of my least favorite places to be. There are many more doctors and specialists I'd rather see than the dentist. But I went, and the experience can be summed up in the words of Johnny Drama: VICTORY! I was complimented on my oral hygiene, and even held up as a model patient. The words "I wish all our patients had as great, clean teeth as you!" we spoken about ME. I gloated. I mentally taunted my childhood dentist and his troop of bitchy hygenists, and sorta thumped my chest at every criticism I ever received: floss more, brush gums, floss more, too much plaque. Take that, motherfuckers! Clearly, I have some unresolved issues with my Raleigh dentist. I had such a positive experience at the new dentist that I completely missed the fact that I had two small cavities that needed to be filled. They were referred to as "occlusal restorations," and never before listening to what a dentist had to say, I tuned the words out and never made the connection. Even when I finally got the picture, I still didn't have a personality change and become Mean Diana. Instead, I actually made an effort to get the first possible appointment so I could get to see Dr. Nance, and her spiffy sidekick Michelle, once again. This from the girl who ate cashews (while having braces, etc) prior to going to the dentist. Even in elementary school I knew how to say "fuck you" without having to actually say it :) My mother was mortified that day; I still relish the creativity of the communication.

So anyway, when the week was over, it was time for Savannah. I flew through Atlanta and arrived Friday night at SAV. We had dinner reservations at Garibaldi's and immediately changed into sweatpants and laid on the couch at Jena's house. Calamari, tilapia and half a creme brulee was a major mistake. But, we survived and shopped til we dropped the next day on Broughton Street. I had my first experience with oysters on Saturday at Bonna Bella and watched football on the deck by a marsh, which struck me as a very low country experience. The Georgia game was on, which is obviously a sacred event. Jena and I couldn't linger because we had to drive out to Tybee for her soon to be sister in law's bacheloretter party, conservative Christian-style. Not a stripper in sight. Flavored lube was the big embarrassing gift. We exited at 8:45 after dinner and just before the games were going to begin. Literally games. No shenanigans, or ballyhoo. Wholesome, PG games. Not that we tore up the town or anything. We went home and did what we do best- vegging on the couch in pjs with magazines, tv and chit chat. Sunday I did my best to sleep in and we went out for brunch. After resuming my spot on the couch and watching a movie, we went downtown to River Street for Greek food- I know, more eating- and I bought pralines to take home to my treatment team. I couldn't know then how revered I would be with this one gift, but damn did people hoot and holler. Before I knew it more than a pound of pralines had been consumed. I was lucky I shook some crumbs out of the box!

So Monday, after a misguided decision, the entire residential unit erupted in a brawl, with practically all the staff present. It was ridiculous. All ten children were sitting in their day room with staff for a meeting about the milieu. It didn't start well, got out of hand, escalated further. The scapegoat of the situation was being pulled out of the room by a nurse (thank God somebody had the foresight to initiate that) when a nasty altercation resulted in the same girl I pulled off of another kid a few weeks ago going after the scapegoat. In a blink of an eye, I was on the attacker, getting clocked in the head, scratched and avoiding biting. Staff held her down briefly while the scapegoat exited the unit. One of my patients started screaming at staff to let her friend go, and then attacked the nurses. She nearly pulled fistfuls of hair out of the head of one acute nurse that had come to the scene. Meanwhile all the other kids were sort of standing there in shock (with a handful of staff who inexplicably didn't move a muscle). Ushering the other kids out took some doing because they were on the brink of getting into it themselves, and basically there was just a lot of unproductive yelling. What I later found out was that the kids that had exited got into a fight on the other side of the unit, resulting in my supervisor's glasses being broken as they were slapped off her face. I later taped them together. All in all it was just a terrible scene.

Today in the shower I found some bruises and scratches I didn't know I had. Luckily, none of them are on my face. I saw in the report that was generated later that four of us had actually gotten clocked in the melee by just this one kid. Ironically, my french stockings made it through the incident, even though my left knee and right thigh were torn up.

Monday was just a wash. The mini riot happened at 12:30 and by 1:00 I was thinking the day seriously needed to be over. Today was better in that I didn't get hit in the face, but aggression on the unit remained. An acute kid beat the crap out of the scapegoat today in school and it was an ugly scene. I don't know why, and I don't know what will happen next with the scapegoat. The futile meetings held today resolved nothing, and I loved how the summary emails from these meetings made little mention of the actual, concrete suggestions that were made by yours truly and other similarly gifted clinicians in the room. I did sort of love seeing the Medical Director passively ream our inept team leader and basically shadow her ass all day. I hope there was a lot of mentoring going on. I busied myself with re-motivating one of my patients to start taking her antipsychotics again, and doing admission paperwork for Shawn, who was totally and utterly swamped. I took the opportunity to do paperwork for 3 hours today because I had half my face numbed by the dentist this morning, and I felt like I was unpresentable. Drooling was kept to a minimum, but I was really self conscious about doing a lot of talking, or eating for that matter. I finally ate lunch around 3:00 when I could feel my lips again.

My coping these days has mainly come from my new Pilates classes. I joined a studio in the West End and really love the instructors. Right now the classes are the best combination of strength training, core workout, and relaxation/mindfulness. I have been leaving feeling quiet, which is far better than I've been feeling at work. The last two days feel like two weeks, and I haven't enjoyed any hours of that time. I am reading a Claire Messud novel, and trying to keep up with my laundry. Today's thrill came from the arrival of my new blockbuster.com dvds!