Wedding week(end): Friday

Hungover, I roused myself at 9:30ish...and got myself prepared for the Bridesmaids Brunch given by Mrs. McPherson at the White Swan Inn. I was afraid I was late, since I hopped in a cab at 11, but I was the first of the 'maids to arrive, and we were all feeling a bit tired from the night before :) Kimra looked rested though, and lovely in her dress! We were treated to pastries, fresh fruit, green salad, and sandwiches, complete with mimosas (I had to say no), lots of Diet Coke (I had to say yes!) and a very nice gift from one of Kimra's Scottish relatives. She had brought us lovely sterling silver necklances with pendants, that are just beautiful.

I hopped into a cab to meet up with Will and we made our way to the Exploratorium for our afternoon reservation. Will had described this museum, and the Tactile Dome in particular, as a favorite memory from childhood and so I was really excited to see it and experience it. We were of course, a bit late, due to funky directions/almost getting on the freeway to go over the Golden Gate. Whoops! We went straight to the back of the museum to the Tactile Dome. We walked in a small room where the attendant told us to take off our shoes and empty our pockets. We put our belongings in the cubbies and sat on benches as she gave us the low-down on the Dome. It's a pitch black dome that only has one way in and one way out. You are supposed to feel your way through it, and for parts you may have to crawl, and/or slide. I was told that if you get stuck or want to get out, just call for help, and the attendant would be on the intercom, and would come and fetch you. So in we went. It was hot, and smelly. Very small. VERY small. Did I mention it was small? My anxiety immediately spiked as I became aware of these facts but pushed on even though I am a well-known claustrophobic. Wearing the dress from the brunch was a huge mistake. But luckily, because we were in the complete and utter pitch black dark, I saw fit to hike my skirt up around my waist. Will said to me as we began feeling around in the dark for the right way to go, "she totally thought you were hot!" And then he starts laughing. "What?" I said. He had just realized we were on the intercom. I started laughing because I had already told him my skirt was up around my waist tucked into the empire waist band. We get dumped out into a section of the dome that was round, and I could not find the next doorway that continued the path. I started to freak a little, internally. Two people pass us, although we could only hear them, not see them. Well frankly I could smell them too because the conditions were so close. I tell Will I'm starting to freak out a little, and he takes the lead. I tell myself that if I can do multiple Outward Bound courses, I sure as hell can do this. We progress a little further and I'm really starting to panic. I tell him this. I start to hyperventilate. I have never in my life felt so close to being out of control before, nor have I ever been in such a small space with no air and no light. I felt in that moment that there were two paths in front of me: 1. I could continue panicking, begin crying, and really lose control of my anxiety. This would probably result in a full blown panic attack AND my being rescued by the attendant. Thus I would become "that girl" to all the people waiting their turn in the waiting room. This did not look like an exciting option. Which brought me to option 2. I could force myself to normally breathing, still be anxious but redirect my thoughts from how uncomfortable and terrible this is and finish this fucker. Will held me and started talking slowly and firmly, instructing me to breathe. I calmed. Holding on to his pant leg, we crawled through the remaining tunnels tandem style. There was a red light embedded in the wall--it was about this time when Will said "I think we're near the end." We put our faces near it and looked at each other. I had a tension headache. But I was thinking THANK YOU GOD. Eventually, I saw the exit ramp, and knew enough to go down feet first, lest I should tumble out with my skirt over my head. I stomp down the stairs with about zero emotional self control left and announced to no one in particular (except the four waiting people seated on the benches) "That was TERRIBLE!" I grabbed my shoes, my purse, my cardigan and exclaimed "I'm LEAVING! And I'm NEVER coming BACK!" And out I went. I believe in the post-script, Will told me that the attendant looked at him like, "Is she okay?" And he just smiled, said something reassuring and followed me out. He then said something like "How bout I get you a Diet Coke?" We went straight to the snack bar. Diet coke. Popcorn. Cookies. Even 30 minutes later I could still feel the stress hormone in my body.

I felt like an absolute a-hole. This was a favorite childhood memory of Will's, and I manage to panic and shit all over it, exclaiming it was "terrible" and that I was "never coming back." Ever. I apologized for this over snacks and he assured me it was a joy to actually be able to take care of me since I never even look close to unglued. Apparently, it made the trip to the Exploratorium worth it. This made me feel a little better, but jeez was I an asshole! Especially since you actually get a window of more than an hour that you can use to re-visit the Dome and go through it again. That was clearly not going to happen for me. I had already sweat through my ENTIRE dress, and our ten minute journey felt like forty-five. So instead we used our time to check out the different exhibits and I eventually simmered down.

But not for long. We were late getting to Mill Valley, and had barely checked into the Mill Valley Inn when the rehearsal dinner began at 7:00. I was in the bathroom putting on make up/trying to do my hair, barking orders to Emily and Will. "Emily, in my suitcase is a brown clutch. Put all contents of black clutch into brown cluth. Will. Find jewelry case. Find gold chain link necklace with brown ribbon and put it on my neck." They totally accommodated me, which convinces me even more they are the best friends a gal could have. In the end we were only about 25 minutes late and no one was seated yet, so I cooled off with about a bottle of very special Pete and Kimra red wine. Kimra and Pete gave gifts to each other, their parents, the ceremony speakers, the groomsmen, us bridesmaids, and generally welcomed/thanked everyone for coming to be a part of the weekend. It was a really lovely time. Kimra gave each of us a beautiful little make up bag from 1154 Lill, one of my favorite stores in Chicago, and a gift card to a favorite restaurant from our hometowns. I was baffled by how she got a gift card for 135 Prime here in Waco. I mean, how could she have even known about it, or known that I liked it? That sneaky Kimra, she contacted one of my friends here and got the goods on my favorite haunts. What then ensued at our table were loads of stories, that I'm sure everyone in the room got to enjoy, particularly the ones about porn, and Emily's stealing a bride's bouquet from a girl in a wheelchair. We were that table. Drunk and loud. I'm sure the 8 year old at the table behind us, and the groom's father, the MINISTER, enjoyed our antics as well. Will and I hit a local Mill Valley bar, aptly named the 2 AM Club before getting to bed late.

The next post I'm sure will start with: And then I roused myself out of bed late for the rehearsal at 9 AM!